I wrote this back in March so Henry was around 4 months old. I just felt so many things about him and about my new experiences as a mother so I thought I would write everything down and have it to look back on and put it out there for my friends. I could add to the list again. Everything is just my opinion and perspective, but here you go :) The picture above is Henry at 4 months :)
Things I’ve learned since becoming a parent
I was thinking the other day of all the things I have learned so far since Henry was born. There are MUCH more than just these but I’m just getting started. J
**You never known real love until you are a parent
My mom told me countless times while I was pregnant that your heart has never felt so full of love until you hold your baby in your arms the first time and realize he/she is yours, forever. Yeah, yeah, I know I would say, but I didn’t really know until I held Henry for the first time. The feeling that your heart could burst it was so full of love for this tiny little person you had only officially just met. The feeling that you would die before letting them be harmed or go after anyone who even looked at them the wrong way.
**Having a baby changes everything
Yep, another one of those things everyone tells you but you don’t really get the full scope of until the baby is with you. Errands become full scale operations that require careful planning, a nice long shower is a luxury, and things you used to do that were so important to you just aren’t anymore. Baby takes precedent over everything. Not that it’s a bad thing, it puts life into perspective and some of the things you used to think were SO important you realize really aren’t much of anything. It changes relationships; not only with your friends but with your husband too. There is less time for the two of you. You run more like tag team wrestlers now but you are closer in a whole new way as well.
**EVERYONE has an opinion about how you should raise YOUR child
This one irks me the most. As a new parent, you most definitely don’t know everything but I think (and I’m pretty sure I’m not alone on this one!) that you should be allowed to make your own decisions and sometimes mistakes because this is after all YOUR child. Everybody, including complete strangers but most of the time family wants to tell you how you should do something pertaining to your child. There is advice on feeding, sleeping, diapers, the doctor, clothing (especially hat wearing). It’s enough to drive the sanest person crazy. I think as a new parent you are already a bit fragile. You don’t know if you are doing everything “just” right and it can leave you feeling downright insecure! The last thing you need is opinions from everyone coming at you from every direction telling you what to do. There are times you need help, there are times you want advice and those are the times you ask for it. Not all advice is bad. The advice of girlfriends who have children already is priceless and the best thing about that kind of advice is it makes you feel as though you can be honest and not be judged.
**The first month sucks
OK, don’t get offended by the title. It’s not the baby that is bad; it’s getting used to the baby and trying to figure the baby out. They are so tiny and fragile; you are scared you may break them! Poop becomes of particular interest. Are they going enough? Is the color normal? What about the texture? Then you worry about feeding. Are they eating enough? Are they eating too much? And of course there is the lovely umbilical stump, will it EVER fall off? He feels hot, is it a fever? Oh my gosh, is this much gas normal? You worry about everything. There is no preventing it J
**Never say never
This one is pretty simple. I said I would NEVER let Henry sleep in the bed with us. HA! He did and still does. I really should switch him over to the crib but I love having him so close. It is so sweet to watch him sleep and he holds my hand while he sleeps. I’m not too eager to give it up just yet J I also said I would never let him sleep in his swing because I was scared he would become dependent on it to fall asleep. He sleeps in it but doesn’t rely on it. Like I said, simple. Never say never because you don’t know what you will do until baby is present and a part of your life.
**You will love and respect your mother SOO much more when you become one
I have a phenomenal Mom. I know it and most of my friends tell me all the time too! She is absolutely wonderful. I knew this before Henry but my love for her reached a whole new level when he was born. She stayed the first week with me and Jeremy helping when we needed it, which we did need since I ended up having a C-section. Pain was not too terrible but there was a long list of things I couldn’t do. She was also so reassuring. She was (and still is I might add) always there when I need her without being judgmental, she would do small things that meant so much, and I could always count on her. I cried the day she left. I’m not ashamed to say. I look forward to her visits and our visits to her. I don’t know, I guess it’s like knowing that she has done exactly what I’m doing and I can level with her about anything. She always knows what to say. I would call her and say “Henry has not let me put him down all day today, I haven’t even showered yet!” and she would reply “Don’t worry, enjoy it! These days will go by fast and you will miss them.” She was right, as usual! I know she is just a phone call away, for anything!
**You can spend hours just looking at your baby
They are perfect in every way-their tiny hands and feet, their chubby cheeks, the sweet little mouth, the rolls on their legs, their sweet smell. Jeremy and I used to spend Henrys first months just watching him and we still marvel at our perfect creation. How could we be so lucky to have something so sweet! I thank God for him everyday.
**Time flies
Kenny Chesney’s song “Don’t Blink” is right on the money. Where does time go? It seems like only yesterday we were bringing Henry home and he is now 4 months old and starting solids. You are eager to see what he will do next, what milestone he will accomplish, but at the same time it’s hard to let him grow. I packed away Henry’s newborn to three month clothes a while back and though “He will never wear these again.” Well duh, you know that but putting them away and sealing the box is really putting an end to that newborn phase of his life. Big times ahead though!
**Stick to your guns
My OB was the one that told me this. At my one week post partum check up he told me to trust my instincts when it came to my baby and keep pursuing things if something didn’t seem right. He said that first time parents get brushed off a lot just because people (pediatricians mostly) assume that they are neurotic first time parents and nothing is really wrong with their child. We found out about this with Henrys 6 week long diaper rash. No one would listen to us. We saw 4 different doctors, used every over the counter cream and most prescription creams too before he was properly diagnosed. If something doesn’t seem right, stay on top of it. Keep on. You are your child’s advocate and you have to be persistent.
**It is your job and your prerogative to make the best decision for your child
So what if somebody else doesn’t like it? It is your job to make decisions that best suit your baby and family, not please everyone else. It is your job to protect your child. I don’t let Henry get passed around like a football when we are in the presence of a large group of people. Got a problem with it? Don’t care! I didn’t take Henry out a whole lot the first three months because it was flu season. Don’t like it? Too bad. If you are sniffling or sick, stay away from my child. Seems harsh? Oh well! I am looking out for his best interest. When you have a child, you can raise him or her how you see fit.
**Being a parent is an awesome responsibility and just plain awesome
There is a lot of responsibility having a child. That pretty much goes with out saying, but being a parent is the best thing ever. I love looking into Henry’s big eyes and wondering what he will do next and become some day. I love spending time on the floor playing with him, rocking him to sleep in the rocking chair, hearing him laugh, seeing that sweet smile, and watching him grow right before my eyes. This is the best job in the world!
I was thinking the other day of all the things I have learned so far since Henry was born. There are MUCH more than just these but I’m just getting started. J
**You never known real love until you are a parent
My mom told me countless times while I was pregnant that your heart has never felt so full of love until you hold your baby in your arms the first time and realize he/she is yours, forever. Yeah, yeah, I know I would say, but I didn’t really know until I held Henry for the first time. The feeling that your heart could burst it was so full of love for this tiny little person you had only officially just met. The feeling that you would die before letting them be harmed or go after anyone who even looked at them the wrong way.
**Having a baby changes everything
Yep, another one of those things everyone tells you but you don’t really get the full scope of until the baby is with you. Errands become full scale operations that require careful planning, a nice long shower is a luxury, and things you used to do that were so important to you just aren’t anymore. Baby takes precedent over everything. Not that it’s a bad thing, it puts life into perspective and some of the things you used to think were SO important you realize really aren’t much of anything. It changes relationships; not only with your friends but with your husband too. There is less time for the two of you. You run more like tag team wrestlers now but you are closer in a whole new way as well.
**EVERYONE has an opinion about how you should raise YOUR child
This one irks me the most. As a new parent, you most definitely don’t know everything but I think (and I’m pretty sure I’m not alone on this one!) that you should be allowed to make your own decisions and sometimes mistakes because this is after all YOUR child. Everybody, including complete strangers but most of the time family wants to tell you how you should do something pertaining to your child. There is advice on feeding, sleeping, diapers, the doctor, clothing (especially hat wearing). It’s enough to drive the sanest person crazy. I think as a new parent you are already a bit fragile. You don’t know if you are doing everything “just” right and it can leave you feeling downright insecure! The last thing you need is opinions from everyone coming at you from every direction telling you what to do. There are times you need help, there are times you want advice and those are the times you ask for it. Not all advice is bad. The advice of girlfriends who have children already is priceless and the best thing about that kind of advice is it makes you feel as though you can be honest and not be judged.
**The first month sucks
OK, don’t get offended by the title. It’s not the baby that is bad; it’s getting used to the baby and trying to figure the baby out. They are so tiny and fragile; you are scared you may break them! Poop becomes of particular interest. Are they going enough? Is the color normal? What about the texture? Then you worry about feeding. Are they eating enough? Are they eating too much? And of course there is the lovely umbilical stump, will it EVER fall off? He feels hot, is it a fever? Oh my gosh, is this much gas normal? You worry about everything. There is no preventing it J
**Never say never
This one is pretty simple. I said I would NEVER let Henry sleep in the bed with us. HA! He did and still does. I really should switch him over to the crib but I love having him so close. It is so sweet to watch him sleep and he holds my hand while he sleeps. I’m not too eager to give it up just yet J I also said I would never let him sleep in his swing because I was scared he would become dependent on it to fall asleep. He sleeps in it but doesn’t rely on it. Like I said, simple. Never say never because you don’t know what you will do until baby is present and a part of your life.
**You will love and respect your mother SOO much more when you become one
I have a phenomenal Mom. I know it and most of my friends tell me all the time too! She is absolutely wonderful. I knew this before Henry but my love for her reached a whole new level when he was born. She stayed the first week with me and Jeremy helping when we needed it, which we did need since I ended up having a C-section. Pain was not too terrible but there was a long list of things I couldn’t do. She was also so reassuring. She was (and still is I might add) always there when I need her without being judgmental, she would do small things that meant so much, and I could always count on her. I cried the day she left. I’m not ashamed to say. I look forward to her visits and our visits to her. I don’t know, I guess it’s like knowing that she has done exactly what I’m doing and I can level with her about anything. She always knows what to say. I would call her and say “Henry has not let me put him down all day today, I haven’t even showered yet!” and she would reply “Don’t worry, enjoy it! These days will go by fast and you will miss them.” She was right, as usual! I know she is just a phone call away, for anything!
**You can spend hours just looking at your baby
They are perfect in every way-their tiny hands and feet, their chubby cheeks, the sweet little mouth, the rolls on their legs, their sweet smell. Jeremy and I used to spend Henrys first months just watching him and we still marvel at our perfect creation. How could we be so lucky to have something so sweet! I thank God for him everyday.
**Time flies
Kenny Chesney’s song “Don’t Blink” is right on the money. Where does time go? It seems like only yesterday we were bringing Henry home and he is now 4 months old and starting solids. You are eager to see what he will do next, what milestone he will accomplish, but at the same time it’s hard to let him grow. I packed away Henry’s newborn to three month clothes a while back and though “He will never wear these again.” Well duh, you know that but putting them away and sealing the box is really putting an end to that newborn phase of his life. Big times ahead though!
**Stick to your guns
My OB was the one that told me this. At my one week post partum check up he told me to trust my instincts when it came to my baby and keep pursuing things if something didn’t seem right. He said that first time parents get brushed off a lot just because people (pediatricians mostly) assume that they are neurotic first time parents and nothing is really wrong with their child. We found out about this with Henrys 6 week long diaper rash. No one would listen to us. We saw 4 different doctors, used every over the counter cream and most prescription creams too before he was properly diagnosed. If something doesn’t seem right, stay on top of it. Keep on. You are your child’s advocate and you have to be persistent.
**It is your job and your prerogative to make the best decision for your child
So what if somebody else doesn’t like it? It is your job to make decisions that best suit your baby and family, not please everyone else. It is your job to protect your child. I don’t let Henry get passed around like a football when we are in the presence of a large group of people. Got a problem with it? Don’t care! I didn’t take Henry out a whole lot the first three months because it was flu season. Don’t like it? Too bad. If you are sniffling or sick, stay away from my child. Seems harsh? Oh well! I am looking out for his best interest. When you have a child, you can raise him or her how you see fit.
**Being a parent is an awesome responsibility and just plain awesome
There is a lot of responsibility having a child. That pretty much goes with out saying, but being a parent is the best thing ever. I love looking into Henry’s big eyes and wondering what he will do next and become some day. I love spending time on the floor playing with him, rocking him to sleep in the rocking chair, hearing him laugh, seeing that sweet smile, and watching him grow right before my eyes. This is the best job in the world!
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