Me....griping....completely MY opinion

This has been bugging me for soo long, so I figured I will blog about it and see if that helps.

I am very much aware of the fact that in our current society it is impossible for mothers to stay at home with their children like they used to and to get by the kiddos have to go to child care so mommy and daddy can both earn a living. I personally think it's sad that this has to happen, I don't blame the mother or think she's bad for doing so, but look at it for what it really is. If I were to work 9-5 during the week right now, that's 40 hours of my week that Henry would not get BUT factor in to that the commute to and from work and daycare. We would probably leave the house by 8:30 at the very latest and not get home until 6, depending on traffic. Henry eats dinner by 6:30 or 7 followed by a bath and bed by 9:30. How much WAKING time did I really get to spend with my child? Not a whole lot. That's sad. Yes, you do have the weekends but the MAJORITY of the child's time is spent in someone else's care. Who is really raising your child?? That was something I told Jeremy over and over as we talked about me staying home with Henry. It is very important to me to be my child's educator, disciplinarian and caretaker. Not that someone else wouldn't do a good job, I just feel like it's MY job. Signed up for it when I got pregnant! That's why it is so incredibly worth it to me to make any sacrifice necessary to be able to stay home and raise my children. Does it mean giving up things we liked or liked to do in the past? Yes. Truth be told, you don't miss those "things" when they are gone. I've been cell phone free for over a year and I sure don't miss it! Plus, instead of driving down the road talking to someone on the phone, I talk to Henry about the things we see and pass. I am forever grateful that my husband is in agreement with my view points and is supportive. Most men would not be.

I've kind of gone off in a different direction. One of the biggest gripes I have with parents is discipline. I saw enough in the public school system and elsewhere that lets me assume parents aren't doing much of anything when it comes to discipline. Does it correlate to the above? Are parents not disciplining their children at home because they feel guilty after spending so much time away? They are not doing their children a favor by letting them have a free for all. Not to mention that bad behavior from a child reflects directly back on the parents. Here's looking at you! I recently received a new parenting magazine in the mail with a cover story titled "The 5 minute Discipline Fix" I flipped to the page to see what advice it had to offer. The gist of the article?? Don't ask questions and don't give your child too many options. Ok....is this not common sense? As they taught in CHFD, never ask a question you don't want an answer to. I don't look at Henry and say "Are you ready to take your bath?" or "Do you want to put your shoes on?" No, when it's time to take a bath I state, "It's time to take a bath" and "We're going to put your shoes on, time to go." There are plenty of times you can give options, but save it for snack or what color shirt they are going to wear for the day. Don't ask your kid if they want to go home now or if they want to come in from playing outside. They are going to say no and you've set yourself up for a fight. Hey, you asked for it!
The other thing that drives me crazy is empty threats without consequence. "Stop that or _____" and then mom and dad never follow through. Yup, you sure showed them! They learn your word means nothing. Yeah, you say stuff but nothing ever happens so why should I stop? Follow through and be consistent.

My expectations on behavior and table manners are high. I think if you start early with a solid foundation you will have smooth sailing in the long run. Your expectations have been established and they know the consequences. Parents that let things go are setting their children up for failure once they reach school where compliance to rules is expected and strictly enforced. They won't understand why all of a sudden they have all of these things they are supposed to do and not do. I don't enjoy getting on to Henry, but I don't want him to end up like some of the kids I have come across. You know what else? He doesn't love me any less. I don't know what parents are so afraid of. I think they are afraid of their kids! So many parents today will pawn their kids off on whoever will take them. Grandparents, babysitter, after school program, recreational activities. Socialization is good for children, no doubt but in some cases, do the parents EVER really do anything?

Parenting is a hard job but hopefully as a responsible adult you knew that before you made the decision to bring another life onto the planet! It's a thankless job with late nights, no vacation or sick days. It is such a wonderful job and such an awesome responsibility. Why are so many people throwing it away??